Why does it always seem to happen? There's an art or writing challenge due today. Here I am with a headache. All I can think of is that ache behind my eyes. I spend hours looking at others' beautiful artwork and watching videos of how to sew together a small art journal. All inspiring stuff, but writing something just doesn't feel exciting. In fact, any time I have an interesting idea for something to write I'm at work or driving or somewhere that I can't even write the idea down. By the time I get to my computer my intereset in the idea has waned or I've forgotten it. Sigh. Inspsiration is a slippery thing. The IDEA of creating something is more exciting than actually doing it, I think. I see so many art journals crammed full of drawings and watercolors and quotes and feelings, but what purpose do they really serve? I feel guilty spending so much time on art for art's sake. I feel the need to justify the time I'm spending on this. What would God have me use it for? That's the answer I'm seearching for. It's much too easy to waste the time we're given, whether it's TV, computer, art. We can't just drift and never question...
This sounds so negative, but it's what plays through my mind a lot. God needs to be the center. Is He?
P.S.-I'm adding this later because I don't want to make others feel defensive about doing art. This was intended as a stream-of-consciousness type of writing; just putting my feelings on paper. So this is what I feel about myself doing art and what it's purpose should be in my life. I'm not judging anyone else because I, unlike God, don't know other people's hearts. I tend to have an addictive nature when it comes to art and it takes over to the point that I neglect other things. On the other hand, I'm also a bit of a martyr and have told myself I couldn't do anything with art for many years because I couldn't do it in a disciplined manner. So, I'm just talking to myself and I hope my readers will keep that in mind. Thanks for dropping by! :)